Wednesday, April 21, 2010

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Wandering about motherhood ... Alpha Females




This
week I took a "moment Daria " at work. I was doing my usual work, when the topic of conversation in the room was about the children, then one of my friends said "oh, have a child is the best thing that can happen to one, is having to live for is to have reason to live ", so I thought out loud without realizing that all we had fallen silent, and what teacher screaming guy episode sausage, echoed in the more acidic instead comment that I have launched here," Ugh, then I have to just kill himself ! "and when I looked up, he had ten women nailing intense, so just thought," Say something intelligent !!!!", say something intelligent so tongue-tied desembarrarla only managed to say "yes, you must be a wonderful experience being a mother, but lives for many more reasons, not ?".... hmmm ... no, finished item, not safe at all.

Everyone tells me that way because I am not yet a mother, but I think that even if it is continue with the same conviction. In Brahmakumaris learned that the first service with which we must fight is the attachment, both individuals and to the material. There are many attachments to the fight I do not care, because I do not want me back again insensitive to the problems of my family, my partner, and the people I love. In any case, so that a child is the reason to live of a woman, do not share. Motherhood is a wonderful thing, and although I have not experienced it themselves, should bring much happiness and fulfillment, but do not think we should back the heart of a woman's life.

few months ago, I met a woman about sixty years ago, who worked as a clerk at the Court. Every day I saw her dressed in black, and his face reflected infinite sadness, and of course we were users who were paying his temper. One day I tried to start a conversation with her, and asked about their hobbies, their interests, so coldly replied that he was not interested at all, that since her son died she wanted to die, and I thought every day why he took it with him. Do not know what to say, but only managed to tell him where that was, he does not like to see it well, but would love to see her happy and eager to live. She almost burst into tears, but held out until he could start a smile.

wish all people, men and women, lived with the firm conviction that here we develop our skills, internal motivation, with the purpose to serve others. That love is the engine that moves us, starting to love ourselves, but this does not happen when we are full of frustrations. Children should not be the only move us, there are many more reasons in life to be happy.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

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This last week has been intense, many changes, news and reflections. I had an experience that made me think about this a lot of women in their role as head ....

Since starting my working life for many years I always worked with men, because in the legal profession there are many women but few heads, few studies or institutions directing. Some colleagues told me they had terrible experiences with gory heads with indecent proposals, but to me fortunately never happened to me anything. On the contrary, I trained for over two years with a lawyer whom I consider my teacher and mentor. He would thank me out so many obscenities gil, many "little something is not dumb!" to arm myself with courage and go for war in this profession, as well as the sincere hug of congratulations for a job well done. Like any good lawyer, well-analyzed each person to know who would be treated. Over time I dubbed my hippie her lawyer because he knew what killed for defending cases and others argued to be fulfilled.

When I started this new job, I was assigned to an area where my immediate superior is a man, he had great confidence in my professionalism and I was quick coupler to the place, had to meet challenges and mostly I felt respected, until just over a month I was told that I moved to another area where my new boss was a woman ...

During this past month ever entered my head to resign, and through meditation I swallowed some hurtful words. There were many long days in which sometimes does not utter a word between us, something that was not strictly necessary for the work he did. Until the day came when the Big Boss called me to ask me how I felt in my new position, no without noting "I know the lady is pretty special," so I certainly sincere with him. Yes, I said that is more than special, they accused me of mistakes I did not commit, but I was patient and waited for the situation changed. Then he told me that she already had advanced and had asked for my change, I thanked him inside but otherwise did not want to imagine what reasons she would have argued to justify its request. Apparently I was good because she already had a long list of records that proved he was really unbearable, but its efficiency and high performance of its functions were to remain there. In moments

she behaved worse, reminded bk's and that he may have mercy for others when you can not do anything for them. Then I told him what was happening to my godfather, what he showed me that the thing was not me, but their bitterness and bad attitude was what she felt her own life. Then accidentally I got to know why she was like this: divorced, with serious health problems, an upbringing in which she was pretty and darling girl that made her so self-centered, plus other details that made me understand many things.

important thing is I'm working in another area and I have to put up with this woman anymore, now I work with a boss man, with more partners, in a very nice and a job worth doing, learning a lot and are sensitized to human suffering, trying to give a little help.

After this experience, I remembered that long ago when I worked in a bank, my boss was a woman, but very different: young, happy, proactive, excellent treatment. Then I remembered I had an Argentine boyfriend with whom she was re happy, they had already formalized the relationship and was about to marry. The reflection of this, is that women might let our personal lives affect both the professional side!. Even with a disastrous personal life, women themselves can be successful professionally, but necessarily have to become bitches??

if it is not an isolated case which occurred to me, but from there I pay more attention to the attitude of women occupying senior positions. The bossy know, the obsessive with perfection, which to compete with their own team, which lost .... Cloths In short, this reflection may be due to what happened to me. In any case, if true I attribute to these women lose their sense of "feminine" sensitivity, men become aggressive in adopting this attitude which confuses vehemence with some belligerence, displacing alpha males and becoming themselves alpha females .....

Thesis, antithesis, synthesis ..... I understand.